歌詞
Verse 1
I say I’m not afraid anymore
But my body still remembers before
It flinches at a shadow’s weight
A reflex I can’t educate.
They said "it’s small," they said "it’s fine"
A fracture smoothed over in time.
But the pressure builds behind the skin
Waiting for the air to let it in.
Pre-Chorus
I clean the room, I bleach the floor
I don’t want to be human anymore.
Order is a lie I tell the light
Before I find the broken blade tonight.
Chorus
I don’t want to be here like this
Half-alive, half-dismissed.
Not screaming, not breaking down
Just slowly erasing out.
I don’t want to make a sound
I don’t want to be found.
I’m not looking for a spark or a start
I just want to take myself apart.
Verse 2
There’s something heavy in my hand
A cold, sharp logic in my plans.
The metal is jagged, snapped in two
Matching everything I’m going through.
I watch the red, I take the notes
I feel the static in my throat.
Awareness doesn't set me free
It just stands there filming me.
Bridge
Clinical calm, dissociate
A defense that learned its job too late.
It kept me safe, then it ate the rest
Left a hollow cavity in my chest.
I’m counting the marks like a grocery list
Evidence that I don't exist.
If I vanished piece by piece,
Would that finally be peace?
Final Chorus / Outro
I don’t want to be saved tonight
I’m tired of the "into the light."
I don’t want to bleed, I don't want to break
I just want to be a mistake they erase.
Same place, same past, same skin
Like I never really lived in it.
Don’t want a future, don’t want a shape
I just want to fade away.
(Just let me fade away.)
I say I’m not afraid anymore
But my body still remembers before
It flinches at a shadow’s weight
A reflex I can’t educate.
They said "it’s small," they said "it’s fine"
A fracture smoothed over in time.
But the pressure builds behind the skin
Waiting for the air to let it in.
Pre-Chorus
I clean the room, I bleach the floor
I don’t want to be human anymore.
Order is a lie I tell the light
Before I find the broken blade tonight.
Chorus
I don’t want to be here like this
Half-alive, half-dismissed.
Not screaming, not breaking down
Just slowly erasing out.
I don’t want to make a sound
I don’t want to be found.
I’m not looking for a spark or a start
I just want to take myself apart.
Verse 2
There’s something heavy in my hand
A cold, sharp logic in my plans.
The metal is jagged, snapped in two
Matching everything I’m going through.
I watch the red, I take the notes
I feel the static in my throat.
Awareness doesn't set me free
It just stands there filming me.
Bridge
Clinical calm, dissociate
A defense that learned its job too late.
It kept me safe, then it ate the rest
Left a hollow cavity in my chest.
I’m counting the marks like a grocery list
Evidence that I don't exist.
If I vanished piece by piece,
Would that finally be peace?
Final Chorus / Outro
I don’t want to be saved tonight
I’m tired of the "into the light."
I don’t want to bleed, I don't want to break
I just want to be a mistake they erase.
Same place, same past, same skin
Like I never really lived in it.
Don’t want a future, don’t want a shape
I just want to fade away.
(Just let me fade away.)